Figure Review: LAIN is Pain, the Queen of Cyberloli Needs Some Photoshop

Lain, possibly the most recognisable recent anime cyberpunk loli, fittingly, requirs a computer program to look good as a figurine. In simple terms, OMG I PAID 6800 YEN FOR THIS SHIT???? THAT I HAVE TO PHOTOSHOP BEFORE IT EVEN LOOKS ANYTHING LIKE HER AND NOT A UNDEAD ZOMBIE SOAKED IN SWIMMING POOL WATER???

Vice kindly had some Yoshitoshi ABe artwork on the inside of the box. Now that is Lain. The figurine itself is not Lain, it’s PAIN!!

Ok maybe I am over-reacting a little. Lain’s clothes and the diorama base are perfectly fine and I would even say they are quite good. What totally irks me is the face. And the pricetag. How does this justify 6800 yen? Vice must die.

But first, photoshop for the win. By increasing the contrast, I made the effects darker and eerier. Just like how Real Mayer looks plain without her make up and Avril Lavigne has dead eyes without those eyeshadow, Lain figurine needs make up.

Tried different settings for each picture.

And now for the real thing.


On first look, Lain figurine’s notable areas are the diorama base and the rather weathered and dirty outfit she’s wearing. The base is a chunk of a staircase and it is curved, with the back portion with its rails tapering off for a vanishing effect. Lain is climbing the stairs, resting her left hand on the wall. The pose is not dynamic but goes the other way – it is motionlessly calming not unlike Nagato Yuki sitting and reading Hyperion. It’s quite a good representation of Lain really.

Her clothes are not squicky clean like most PVCs, but intentionally deeply shaded and toned for a dark and dirty feel. As you can see, they sure succeeded in creating a "dirty" effect since it does look like she rolled around in coolant fluid and hasn’t bathed in days. This sort of uncleanliness does well to bring out the gritty cyberpunk element of Serial Experiment Lain. Pretty unique but not quite orthodox figurine beauty. Imagine if a clean paintjob was applied, that would be totally out of place.

And I have finished talking about the good parts.

Attached to the base by three plugs, Lain was rather hard to squeeze in but very secure once in. She is actually leaning a tiny bit on the wall. Otherwise, if a force is applied outwards, she does tend to tilt a bit to her right and make violent creaking noises. Probably secure though.

I remember the dark sillouettes.

No upskirt picture but we have backwall. Anyway her panties are sort of whitish beige and very hard to spot.

To understand why this figure truly is the product of hellspawn, we must first understand what features Lain has that make her a cyber goddess.

She has asymmetrical hair – her left side is kept long and tied up. Asymmetry is cool! Vice’s figurine replicates this hairstyle but to poor effect. Her hair looks like a helmet with a sausage dangling.

Lain is loli with a dark side. The figurine has the loli, but the dark side is sorely lacking thanks to a poor choice of facial skin colour tone and a bad facial sculpt. Lain figurine’s face looks like an overweight zombie.

Lain has intelligent but emotionless eyes with a tinge of angst. The figure has an average decal for the eyes. Decent but not good enough. ABe’s artwork is put to shame.

So I have to give this figure low marks for the high cost, poor representation especially the face and a crap haircoconut masquerading as the hair. Points for the base though. Do note that the character score grades how much I am glad that the particular anime character was figurised and not how well she is represented.


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