IMPZ! Your Newspaper is Nothing Compared to MINE!! PWNED!! at Riuva : Research Institute for Unicultural Visual Arts

IMPZ! Your Newspaper is Nothing Compared to MINE!! PWNED!!

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Popularity: 24% [?] Published by tj_han July 26th, 2007 in Culture

The title says it all.

Impz was all happy about being the new poster boy for anime lovers in Singapore but his face will turn a purple shade of pale when he sees my own news article ousting his. Why? Because mine is written by a member of the alpha tribe, a Japanese (WOW), for the JAPANESE!! Those of the holy bloodline would have read the article I starred in. Imagine this: a Japanese sailor-uniform-wearing loli on her way to school, reads the morning papers and sees good ol’ TJ Han in it. Beat that, Impz!!

FYI, this is from the Shizuoka Shimbun or something, at least 6 years ago when I was 15. Yes I looked gay back then, but so does Impz. But here am I, in an awesome blazer, making an awesome speech in awesone Japanese, to an awesome Minister of Education for an awesome province (Shizuoka) and an awesome Mayor of Hamamatsu (famous for awesome unagi)!!!!!

You can actually see my real name if you read closely.

If you read the article, the reporter praises my l33t Japanese skills. In the speech, I mentioned how I wanted to tell my friends and family back in Singapore about the greatness of Japan. Well I think I have done that, through this blog. JAPAN, the land of the loli and the lolicon. Visit it please.

So, my article is better than that Impz right? Right? RIGHHHHHHTTTT? Bye beeee!!

Popularity: 24% [?]

24 Responses to “IMPZ! Your Newspaper is Nothing Compared to MINE!! PWNED!!”

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1 DrmChsr0 191 comments Jul 26th, 2007 at 2:24 am

LOL

This beats DM’s interview anytime.
2 Totali 19 comments Jul 26th, 2007 at 3:00 am

lol wow….this article pwns.
3 Melonpan 20 comments Jul 26th, 2007 at 3:38 am

Lol omedetou!

Nice job, desu! - Now go! Conquer tha worldo!
4 Owen S 144 comments Jul 26th, 2007 at 4:01 am

Stop using imitation Viagra for your e-penis tj.
5 ojisan 3 comments Jul 26th, 2007 at 4:23 am

OK ok you got the wider distribution its true, but Impz gets a better image you’ve gotta admit (though you won’t!)
6 tj_han 1442 comments Jul 26th, 2007 at 5:34 am

I actually think Impz’ Today has a larger circulation than Shizuoka Shimbun but that’s not the point isn’t it?
7 Windbell 21 comments Jul 26th, 2007 at 9:14 am

That was 6 years ago. 6 YEARS AGO!

Japan has more than just being the land of loli and lolicon ^^;
8 Lupus 67 comments Jul 26th, 2007 at 11:51 am

This is interesting, never knew you had been on exchange to Japan and can speak good Japanese.
9 bj0rN 153 comments Jul 26th, 2007 at 12:35 pm

wtf? is this like another tsubaki spoof where he lied about meeting hirano aya?
10 Crusader 28 comments Jul 26th, 2007 at 5:47 pm

Hmmm…I take many issues with the Japanese Ministry of Education, talking about how “Great Japan” in their presence makes you seem like a collaborator to their historical fiction text books… I am assured that such was not your intention yes?

Every dog has his day you had yours six years ago at the tender age of 15, Impz finally got his though I must say its not really much of day.
As for visiting Japan I plan on using government funds to do it. Just waiting for a spot to clear in the Imperial States occupation force.
11 tik 67 comments Jul 26th, 2007 at 7:16 pm

“for an awesome province (Shizuoka)”

second, since this is where the great chibi-maruko chan came from
12 tiny Red Man 149 comments Jul 26th, 2007 at 7:22 pm

congrats the both of u anywyay, ur name is sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo tiny…dunno-dunno wat han-kun..
13 hitoshura 37 comments Jul 26th, 2007 at 7:29 pm

you didnt try to hook up with any sailor uniform loli while you were there during that time?

What the hell?
14 double 115 comments Jul 26th, 2007 at 9:30 pm

Lol you waited 6 years to increase the size of your e-penis. Congrats lol
15 ToooP 7 comments Jul 27th, 2007 at 1:16 am

It says jia han
theres only a smallmiserable para about you saying how you want to tell your family n friends about what you learnt in japan.
bet the sailor uniform lolis ran when they say him
16 Usagi 29 comments Jul 27th, 2007 at 6:12 am

LOL indeed XD
17 PP 2 comments Jul 27th, 2007 at 8:54 pm

>.
18 Elydis 32 comments Jul 27th, 2007 at 10:43 pm

Lol tj wins hands down
19 Rakugakid 32 comments Jul 28th, 2007 at 12:30 pm

Wow you really owned this time but do you really look like that 15 years ago? The picture makes you look square
20 Zeroblade 163 comments Jul 30th, 2007 at 6:23 pm

You know, if I didn’t know that you were 15 in the picture, I’d have thought you were at least 20 there.
21 astrobunny 7 comments Aug 1st, 2007 at 1:55 am

“Jan Han-kun, in the Japanese he learnt said, ‘OMG I t3h wanna t3ll a11 my fam1ly and fri3ndz t3h l33t th1ngz *I* l34rntz in Nih0n’ ”

… well it sounded like that to me if I thought about it in English ^^;

Nice uniform btw. Those pants must’ve been easy to stain
22 Alterac 1 comment Feb 13th, 2009 at 5:52 am

I was mislead into thinking your surname was ‘han’ till i read this article. good job btw.

Do not use any < and > for your own sake. It will end the comment there and then. Also, there is an automatic IQ filter which weeds out comments made by those who accidentally got transported from the stone age.

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